I never really dated in high school, nor did I care to. I didn't like any of the guys in my class and I wasn’t all that confident in myself either. Granted, there were only about sixty guys to choose from and while all of them were expectantly very immature, I was wise beyond my years. My longest relationship back then was three dull months with the drum major of the marching band, (in which I was the token female tuba player). He was three years older than me - pretty scandalous back then. He broke up with me (via a note handed to me by a friend) because I seemed "uninterested." Thinking back I'm surprised it took him that long to realize. I never really did like him. I thought that having a boyfriend would pay off - maybe make me a little more 'normal' as everybody in high school is striving to be - but the novelty quickly faded. He wasn't interesting enough. Could there ever be anyone that was interesting enough? And the tone of my dating history is set...
Fast forward about four years. College started and, of course, my thoughts about dating were: "There are so many people here! And they're all probably really, really intriguing/eccentric/not completely boring/etc.!" So, I ended up dating a hippie for a bit. Interesting indeed... Luckily, a day after we had broken up I met another guy. The first guy I would ever be truly in love with. He was happy with life, hilarious, sociable, intrigued by everything, adventurous, and fun. Bad news was that he went to a different college. A different college that was about two hours away by car. Eight hours by bus (which I endured one too many times). Nevertheless, we were loopy for each other and we both agreed to make things work. They did for nearly two years, but we eventually fell apart. At some point the romance had stopped and we had started to become best friends rather than significant others.
So, now, for the first time in my college career, I am single. What on Earth do I do?! Fortunately, I figured that out pretty fast: Locate good looking male. Drink. Flirt. Drink. Dance. Flirt. Drink. Flirt. Drink. Exchange numbers. Hang out. Flirt. Drink. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand (potentially) sex.
Yeah. You heardme. I like sex. A lot. There. That's that and that's it. There is absolutely nothing more to it, just like it says in the description of my OKC test result. I'm more like a guy than most girls when it comes to this...which I think is kind of strange, honestly, but I suppose it's a part of what makes me awesome. Or so says OKC. Now, don't get me wrong, I AM a hopeless romantic too. I want to get married and have babies and live in cottage in the English countryside. So it is kind of hard to differentiate between a quality guy and, well, just another opportunity. And I do think about it. I think about it really hard before coming to a conclusion. However, the reality of the situation is that I am in college and (most) of the guys I meet are in college too: All the good looking, worthwhile guys are taken and everyone else is just looking for a hookup. If he isn't and he's genuinely interested in me, that’s awesome. But I haven't met a guy like that yet. (I blame my curves, red hair, charming smile, cute giggle, winning personality...and my strong sense of self.)
I have had a few guys in my life since my ex. Some of them I met online, others I did not. The ages range from nineteen to twenty-eight and the time I spent with each of them (and only them) from a few weeks to a few months. So, I'm not a serial seducer. I do attach to men. Just not that easily. I have to find them intriguing. They have to be willing to show me their eccentric side. (At this time I’d like to make an announcement: Robert Downey, Jr. is my dream guy because he is such a weirdo. Moving on…) I am very easily bored by people, life, etc. It's probably a diagnosable psychiatric problem. Whatever the case, I've taken to this online gig just to have another venue for dating opps.
Sigh. So, no, it's not a confidence problem. I'm incredibly happy with myself. It's not daddy issues either. I love my dadders! He's a great dude. And no, I'm not trying to make up for all of my nerdy years in high school. If I had been into any of the guys I went to school with, believe me, I would have done something about it. Plus…I’m still a big ‘ol nerd.
But what do I have to explain myself to you for? ;)
Stories to come.